Creating space for someone is more than just for their healing–you can create safe space where someone feels protected and free. Free to be themselves and do whatever they want. But here’s the thing–men must recognize when they can create safe space and protect it too. I stopped drumming the other night when a guy touched someone dancing inappropriately, and she didn’t invite it. Yet he thought she was “asking for it.” I told him that’s wrong–she wasn’t asking for it. She was asking for safe space to express herself freely, and when he touched her, she was confused and scared because she didn’t know who did it, and then her brain automatically follows the same neural pathways from past trauma and hurt (we all do, until we rewire our brains). The safe space was gone then. And so was she. But the important thing is that he listened. He understood when I explained that the only thing someone’s ‘asking for’ is just to feel safe. It’s amazingly simple, and I hope this message can be spread to others, to educate people about how we work. Recognize the sensory acuity of people’s expressions, movements, and language. We’re all human, and we’re in this together. Were in this for good! That’s how we evolve.
=D